The Sex is Incredible

I often date bi-polar girls just for the sex.

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Mad About You

He’s sitting next to me on the couch. He’s got his Santa Claus Santa Claus suspenders on. This means he’s got suspenders which have Santa Claus on them, but they also happen to be the suspenders he’ll wear when playing Santa Claus. Though I doubt this will happen, because, while he is jolly (mostly a sarcastic jolly, though) he’s not fat. And never will be.

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Upon Discovering the Mountains Have Inverted Themselves

So you’re sitting in your kitchen in the early morning watching the tiny white television that your Grandmother got you as a housewarming gift.  It’s an especially important Tuesday, and like most humans in the world, you are glued to the television.  Last night you couldn’t sleep, no one could, the ground rumbled and tumbled for hours. As you awoke you realized what the disturbance was, the mountains, during the night, had inverted themselves.  No one knows why or how, the news reports give you nothing but numbers of people missing and visuals of inverted mountains around the world.  Only the mountains, nothing else had inverted itself.

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